Hospitality is a strange thing in our culture. At times, it no longer looks like what it did in scripture and instead has become something done in the restaurant industry or a way to show off what we have by throwing parties or events. At other times, we see incredible hospitality, though I’m not sure the world would describe it as such. We see people serving meals in the inner city, meeting at a McDonald’s or Tim Hortons for coffee, or having someone over for a simple meal like pancakes.
I remember in high school, one family that every Sunday would invite someone over for lunch. They would make pancakes each time because it was easy and quick. In a world of cooking and decorating shows, that seems contrary to how our culture understands hospitality, where we put our best forward – our best food, decorations, clothing, etc.
So, what is hospitality? I suggest that hospitality sacrifices our routines and schedules to make space for others in our lives. It has nothing to do with expense, decorations, quality of food, or anything else. Essentially, it’s showing value for others by making space in our lives for them. Hospitality is not about you; you need to set aside your desires and interests, put someone else first, and make space for them.
Inviting Others
Having someone in your home is not always hospitality. The motive is more important than the event. Is your desire first to love someone, show them value and engage with them? Are you more focused on talking or listening? Does your home have to be perfect or are you ok letting people see a bit of mess in your life? Is the event more about having everything perfect or more about the person? Many questions can be asked, but when it comes down to it, what is your motive for inviting others into your home and life? A posture of value, love and self-sacrifice is foundational to hospitality. When you have people in your home, is the person (or people) you invite the top priority?
Going to Others
People assume that hospitality is inviting others. However, going to someone else’s home can be an act of hospitality. Is it about the person first, or are you comparing with yourself? We often want to host so we have control and can have things the way we like them, but hospitality can be shown by giving up control and accepting someone else’s invitation. We see this with Jesus eating in the home of a tax collector. Jesus met the man on the man’s terms…. That is hospitality.
Hospitality as a Church
I hope we are a place of hospitality as a church, but churches can be unwelcoming. Sure, we have greeters and hosts, but as a church community, do we practice hospitality where we set aside what’s best for us to make our church welcoming to others? Whether it be an age-based ministry, small group, or a team or committee, do we feel the need to welcome others into our circle, or do we want to keep things the way they are?
As a church, we can do several things each week to increase our hospitality as we welcome the community into our church:
- Always make time for people you don’t know or don’t know well. I intentionally find someone to connect with and get to know a bit. Whether before or after the service, even taking five minutes can make a massive difference to someone visiting our church.
- Sit farther up in the sanctuary. Visitors rarely want to sit in the front row, yet most people in our church fill up the back first. By making space for visitors, we set aside our preferences and help them feel comfortable as ‘outsiders’ in our church gathering. If everyone shifted up a couple of rows, there would be lots of space for people visiting to sit in the back.
- Sit somewhere different. Last spring, I challenged our church to move around the sanctuary. Instead of always sitting in your preferred spot, sit somewhere different each week. You’ll be amazed how easily connecting with new people is. Instead of waiting for people to come to you, you can go to them.
- Park farther away. The church parking lot can fill up fast. Those visiting might not know we have overflow parking in the dental office lots. If we show hospitality, we can make the parking more accessible and closer for those new to our church gathering.
- Consider inviting someone for lunch after church once a month. Order pizza, put soup in a crockpot, or even have sandwiches to keep the meal simple. Do what it takes to make it happen.
Those are five easy ways to show hospitality. There is one more thing we can do, though:
Invite someone to church.
Make space in your schedule to be at church when you do this so that when the person you invite visits, they can connect with you. Once we get past any hangups, it’s simple to ask someone to church.
God models hospitality
Why do we practice hospitality? Because God has shown us hospitality. Through Jesus’ death and resurrection, God has opened to allow us to be in a relationship with Him with the promise of eternal life, our hope in Christ, and receiving God’s love. We show hospitality because it is something we first received from God. He invites us to share in a meal at the Lord’s Supper. He provides his Holy Spirit to comfort us, and the promise of salvation is eternal life in a relationship with God.
Mike Engbers is the Lead Pastor at Parliament Community Church in Regina, SK, Which is located near Harbour Landing. As a church, we offer programs for all ages, from children to youth, young adults to Seniors who are part of our Heritage groups. We are also diverse in cultural backgrounds but share a desire to grow as disciples of Christ together.